Surgery Day: Post-op

There is one thought that comes to mind when I think of pre-op -- FEAR!!!! MAJOR FEAR!! The truth is, I have never had surgery (except for a tonsillectomy when I was 4).

Fortunately, and I know that I was worried about something silly, I did make it a point to have everything in order at home and the office -- one never knows! But, my faith allowed me to rest easier. I know I am forgiven (which I definitely need) and I know where my final resting-place will be. I found peace in that. It did not necessarily take away the fear, but I did keep it under control.

That morning getting ready was fast. Fear can motivate a man to move quickly. I did appreciate my “last shower” and “my last knee bending” before leaving. We get to the hospital right at 6:00 am.

In an interesting coincidence of timing, my father was to have hemorrhoid surgery that morning also at 7:30 am. Although he was an outpatient and in the doctor’s office, I did have some fun making sure that they had the right ‘Ron McClellan’ for my paperwork.

We go through the check-in. I wonder why they have you come in so early. I was in my lovely blue gown, the one that opens in the back, and ready to go by 6:30. So, my wife and I waited for 45 minutes until they moved me into the surgery area.

I had read all of the stories about not being able to ‘pee’ after surgery. I was even careful not to drink too much liquid the night before. But nobody mentioned that I would have to go some many times before surgery. I went twice at home. I went once before I got into my gown. I went once after I got into my gown.

After they wheel me over to pre-op waiting (basically a large hall way with a lot of room for gurneys) and, as I lay with the other folks looking so scared, I had to go again. I mentioned to a nurse that I need to go real bad. She calls for a male nurse to bring me a urinal. When he arrives, I look at him and ask, “Here, in the middle of the hallway?”. I guess he feels pity for me, so he takes me down the hall to the staff locker room and I go a whole lot! I had no idea the bladder could be so good at storing stuff.

I waited a long time in the holding area. They brought out blankets that were nice and warm (from the blanket toaster). I kidded with some of the other operating room nurses and physicians. I chatted with my anesthesiologist about things.

Some male nurses were kidding a female nurse about her OR scrubs. I heard them say she should go up a size in scrubs. I did not understand what they were talking about, so I looked at them. One of the male nurses saw me glance over and asked if I agreed. Now, I did not know what they were talking about, but you are lying waiting to go into surgery, and someone wearing operating room scrubs asks if you agree, you do not ask for clarification. You agree. So I did. They all thought it was quite funny that a patient would agree that this nurse is wearing her scrubs ‘too tight’! Oh no. What if she was in MY OR? Would she give me post-anesthetic suggestions that would make me nuts? She did not seem too mad, but I felt much better when she came walking down the hall in a pair of scrub pants that were at least 35 inches too big across her waist. Everybody was laughing hysterically at that.

As they wheeled me into the OR (finally), the nurse said, ok, here is Ron McClellan, for the hemorrhoid surgery!

CONTINUE...